[Right, yes, let's try to avoid that particular sad spiral if at all possible...! It's fine, Rita will survive without a hug at least a bit longer. Nothing else to worry about, only sundries packages now...
Jade slowly releases Natsuno's shoulder as he finally sets the flamethrower aside, and is mildly relieved when he doesn't promptly bolt for the door and instead reaches for his phone. Probably contacting Rita...that's likely fine. Seems the distraction is sufficient; Jade draws a pace back, and then nods, smiling wryly as he turns to the desk.]
The number of packages has certainly been increasing of late, hasn't it? Supposedly it's all random chance, but I do wonder sometimes. The last package was about as harmless as they could possibly get, at least, but with my luck generally considered I get a feeling this new one might be--
[......Oh, huh. Wait a minute. Jade pauses with his hand over the small box on the desk, and looks back over at Natsuno.]
--Actually. Now that I think about it...I never did get around to showing you what that last package was, did I?
[You know, the one he'd sent Natsuno a text about...after he'd blown himself up. Earlier last month...]
[Jade's ended up foregoing picking up the box on the desk in favor of leaning down to open one of the drawers instead, and so Natsuno isn't stopped from his inspection. The desktop box is fairly small, and barely weighs anything when picked up; there's perhaps a very slight rustle of something like paper inside, when shaken. Alongside a vague scent of...photo laminate, perhaps...?
Natsuno may end up distracted from his investigation before long, though, because Jade's pulling a rather larger box from that drawer and setting it on the desktop about now. Long since freed of the nautical wrapping paper it had also arrived in...]
--Right, I suppose at the time you were rather...occupied. [When Natsuno says it like that...ah, but the avoidance about the mugs even in his current state is an appreciated thing. Jade tries to move on before either of them can linger overly-long on exactly why Natsuno was ""occupied"" at that time...] But this was another package that showed up, sometime after those. Honestly, I haven't the faintest idea where to even begin guessing its origins, but...
[Jade takes the lid off the box, to reveal...a certain ship, in miniature...!]
Edited (oops need the link huh) 2022-11-26 13:47 (UTC)
[The new delivery is very light, and smells like something familiar, but he can't quite recognize what in his state. It's... probably not dangerous, though? Maybe embarrassing? Either way, Natsuno is indeed distracted by the bigger box. He does make a face when Jade mentions he's been "occupied," but shakes his head stubbornly immediately after. Clarke told him he can mourn LATER and that's exactly what he's going to do! We're focusing on the new box now! It's a -
Huh. Natsuno peers inside the box and picks up the model - ooooh, there's a remote inside too.]
...I dunno what it's supposed to be.
[A toy tank? Ship? He turns one of the mounted cannons with a finger. Look at all these moving parts...]
[There sure is a remote in there, yes! While Natsuno takes up the ship between his hands, Jade reaches to extricate said controller in turn, setting it on the tabletop. ...So far so good all around here. They've managed to sidestep any potential depression spiral landmines so far, and Natsuno still seems sufficiently distracted as well. He might just depart entirely from that flamethrower tangent yet, hopefully...!
But in the meantime, Jade makes no move to take the model away. In fact, he's now settling back down into the desk chair, the better to idly watch as Natsuno pokes at the moving parts.]
That...is an almost unsettlingly accurate miniature model of the land dreadnought Tartarus. ...Which was my ship, back home.
[A wry sort of amusement tints Jade's tone, in this answer. It's at least easier to level this explanation now that there's been over a month for the bemusement at the existence of this thing to wear off...]
One of the newer fontech military transports produced by engineers in the Imperial Forces. Its actual size would be...hmm, about half the height and length of this ship we're on now, being a far more practical and efficient vessel. [By now he may or may not be housing an even further-cemented conviction that cruise ships are incredibly overrated and THE TARTARUS IS STILL BETTER IN EVERY WAY, SUCK IT CAPTAIN--] Armed with nearly two dozen fonic cannons and capable of full-body fonic shielding as well. It could traverse both land and water. ...This remote here can control that thing, it seems.
[Which he recnetly learned as part of his latest reading binge. Quite a fitting name for a heavily armed dre - dead - military vessel. Natsuno doesn't bother to explain what "Greek" is, moving on to the next stepping-stone in his drunken stream of consciousness.]
That's pretty cool. [Commanding a breatnought. Ship thing. Also the model. He wouldn't have admitted to finding it cool if he was sober.] They should've included a tiny Jade too. Standing here.
[Natsuno taps the model's deck before placing it on the floor and picking up the remote.]
Wonder if it comes with batteries... they always make you buy those separately... oh.
[Look like batteries are included, because the tiny Tartarus races across the carpet. So this how you steer, and this button -
The tiny cannons fire their tiny fonic attack at Jade. Natsuno chuckles and fires again.]
[Yeah, an explanation as to what the term "Greek" actually means would have been nice, though Jade can extrapolate that it's some form of mythology likely originating on Earth rather easily enough. Which...makes the fact that it also means "hell" a pretty surprising thing? 'Tartarus' is a name with Ancient Ispanian roots itself, and the base meaning is actually about the same I say as I grasp around for justifiable in-universe reasons as to why there's so many Earth-origin terms in this fuckin canon rip me, which makes for some...actually kind of fascinating implications, about apparent parallels between their realities--
But that's beside the point about now, isn't it? Considering the much more preoccupying topics Natsuno's moving onto from there. Name origin roots and their semantics will need to be tabled for another time; the remark about a miniature Jade getting placed on the deck earns a bit of a laugh.]
Oh, there ought to be other soldiers too, if the deck's to be populated. Probably for the better that there aren't any person-shaped figures at all, though; not sure I care for miniatures of myself apparently being cobbled together someplace. [Such an accurate model of the ship is kind of weird already anyway! ...Although. Even while the laugh remain a short one, a slight and moderately satisfied smile can't help but linger afterwards, with Natsuno's assessment of the ship being made. Definitely not something he would normally say sober, Jade imagines, which means these must be his honest thoughts indeed. (What a vindicating thing, getting an emo teen to actually agree on the impressiveness of something like this...!)] It is quite 'cool', though, isn't it? Rest assured it's an exceedingly impressive sight at full size...but so long as we're here, I suppose this model is as good a display as any of--
[Oh, there it goes zipping across the floor, accompanied even by a soft thrum of miniaturized engines despite the fact that it probably is battery-powered in some way. But--wait a minute--
The little cannons fire off with crackling little pops, and the pinprick volley assails Jade's ankles.]
--Ah, I hadn't realized those actually shoot. That's--hold on, now-- [Natsuno...please....the shots are barely felt, of course, but Jade's still shifting his ankles aside where he's seated a bit exasperatedly when Natsuno fires them off again.] --No need to have too much fun, over there! Hmm, though I can now attest that those cannons are entirely harmless at that size, it seems...almost a bit of a shame.
[......Wait, hold on, did Natsuno acutally chuckle just now--?]
["not sure I care for miniatures of myself apparently being cobbled together someplace" well that's just asking for cursed merch regains
Anyway, Natsuno is definitely enjoying himself and most definitely chuckling. In fact, he snorts again when Jade makes a fuss at being shot at. He makes the model face him and shoot to see what the big deal is, but it's just a tiny pinprick.]
Don't whine.
[There's another button he's yet to try. Natsuno presses it and activates the shield.]
Whoa... that's so well made. You should throw something at it to see if it holds.
[One of these days that rappig onesie + assorted merch is going to actually arrive from sundries and Jade's unintentional cursed merch regain foreshadowing is going to come back to bite him in truly the most mortifying way possible--
But anyway!! Anyway. There's more present cursed things to be worried about, namely: the fact that Natsuno really is outright having himself a laugh over there, as the Tartarus model zips and turns about, its tiny little fonic cannon rounds tested a couple more times as if this is the most pleasantly novel thing the boy's encountered in months. ...Well, alright, so it's not actually a terribly cursed sight. Strange, though, with how rare it is to see on Natsuno's features or hear in his voice. Jade may or may not be using the handful of seconds he takes meticulously readjusting his posture in his seat, still pointedly out of ankle-shooting range, to cast Natsuno a truly speculative sort of look across the way while the latter's distracted...
Hmm, he's truly almost acting his evident age here, in all the ways that rather more carefree teenaged boys might.
...It's unfortunate, that it'd take some bizarrely powerful form of alcohol to invoke this in him nowadays.]
--I am not whining. [The objection is slightly delayed, and a bit distracted, but fortunately Natsuno's activating the tiny shield around this point, which is unsurprisingly pretty engaging in its own right. Even Jade hums in a bit of surprise about here, though; wasn't expecting it to have that feature either, honestly??] But that is surprisingly thorough, to be included as well. ...That shielding's meant to hold against exceptionally large fonic shell impacts at the least. [Honestly, he probably shouldn't be indulging things too much here. Natsuno's still drunk, and they still need to get to the bottom of how this is actually happening, but. On the other hand. ...It is still a pretty effective distraction from him immediately heading over to Rita's with a flamethrower about now. And...he's just so happily fascinated by all this. Ah well.] Let's see...
[Reaches across the desk and then kind of, idly lobs one of Natsuno's smaller horror novels at it?
The shield snaps and sizzles on impact with it--but does hold, surprisingly, which means that the book ends up bouncing off it slightly.]
[Natsuno's been staring expectantly, and the shield didn't disappoint. The book actually bounced off!]
That would've been useful against the zombies.
[He definitely has no concept of just how big the original Tartarus is, not in his state. Natsuno's thought already drift to the last feature he's yet to test, and he stumbles toward the bathroom, steering the model along - even letting out a distracted vrooooom sounds when it zips through the bathroom door.
It's supposed to move in water, right? Natsuno turns the tap on, considers and calls back to Jade:]
D'you have a water arte? It's gonna take forever until the bath gets filled.
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Jade slowly releases Natsuno's shoulder as he finally sets the flamethrower aside, and is mildly relieved when he doesn't promptly bolt for the door and instead reaches for his phone. Probably contacting Rita...that's likely fine. Seems the distraction is sufficient; Jade draws a pace back, and then nods, smiling wryly as he turns to the desk.]
The number of packages has certainly been increasing of late, hasn't it? Supposedly it's all random chance, but I do wonder sometimes. The last package was about as harmless as they could possibly get, at least, but with my luck generally considered I get a feeling this new one might be--
[......Oh, huh. Wait a minute. Jade pauses with his hand over the small box on the desk, and looks back over at Natsuno.]
--Actually. Now that I think about it...I never did get around to showing you what that last package was, did I?
[You know, the one he'd sent Natsuno a text about...after he'd blown himself up. Earlier last month...]
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The last package?
[He reaches out for the box. If not stopped, he'll pick it up to rattle and even sniff.]
Last I remember was the mu - Rita's sandwiches.
[Natsuno knows the mug shouldn't be mentioned. Unfortunately, alcohol makes some of his internal dialog external.
He doesn't remember Jade texting him about another package. Last month was uh. Busy.]
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Natsuno may end up distracted from his investigation before long, though, because Jade's pulling a rather larger box from that drawer and setting it on the desktop about now. Long since freed of the nautical wrapping paper it had also arrived in...]
--Right, I suppose at the time you were rather...occupied. [When Natsuno says it like that...ah, but the avoidance about the mugs even in his current state is an appreciated thing. Jade tries to move on before either of them can linger overly-long on exactly why Natsuno was ""occupied"" at that time...] But this was another package that showed up, sometime after those. Honestly, I haven't the faintest idea where to even begin guessing its origins, but...
[Jade takes the lid off the box, to reveal...a certain ship, in miniature...!]
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Huh. Natsuno peers inside the box and picks up the model - ooooh, there's a remote inside too.]
...I dunno what it's supposed to be.
[A toy tank? Ship? He turns one of the mounted cannons with a finger. Look at all these moving parts...]
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But in the meantime, Jade makes no move to take the model away. In fact, he's now settling back down into the desk chair, the better to idly watch as Natsuno pokes at the moving parts.]
That...is an almost unsettlingly accurate miniature model of the land dreadnought Tartarus. ...Which was my ship, back home.
[A wry sort of amusement tints Jade's tone, in this answer. It's at least easier to level this explanation now that there's been over a month for the bemusement at the existence of this thing to wear off...]
One of the newer fontech military transports produced by engineers in the Imperial Forces. Its actual size would be...hmm, about half the height and length of this ship we're on now, being a far more practical and efficient vessel. [By now he may or may not be housing an even further-cemented conviction that cruise ships are incredibly overrated and THE TARTARUS IS STILL BETTER IN EVERY WAY, SUCK IT CAPTAIN--] Armed with nearly two dozen fonic cannons and capable of full-body fonic shielding as well. It could traverse both land and water. ...This remote here can control that thing, it seems.
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[Which he recnetly learned as part of his latest reading binge. Quite a fitting name for a heavily armed dre - dead - military vessel. Natsuno doesn't bother to explain what "Greek" is, moving on to the next stepping-stone in his drunken stream of consciousness.]
That's pretty cool. [Commanding a breatnought. Ship thing. Also the model. He wouldn't have admitted to finding it cool if he was sober.] They should've included a tiny Jade too. Standing here.
[Natsuno taps the model's deck before placing it on the floor and picking up the remote.]
Wonder if it comes with batteries... they always make you buy those separately... oh.
[Look like batteries are included, because the tiny Tartarus races across the carpet. So this how you steer, and this button -
The tiny cannons fire their tiny fonic attack at Jade. Natsuno chuckles and fires again.]
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I say as I grasp around for justifiable in-universe reasons as to why there's so many Earth-origin terms in this fuckin canon rip me, which makes for some...actually kind of fascinating implications, about apparent parallels between their realities--But that's beside the point about now, isn't it? Considering the much more preoccupying topics Natsuno's moving onto from there. Name origin roots and their semantics will need to be tabled for another time; the remark about a miniature Jade getting placed on the deck earns a bit of a laugh.]
Oh, there ought to be other soldiers too, if the deck's to be populated. Probably for the better that there aren't any person-shaped figures at all, though; not sure I care for miniatures of myself apparently being cobbled together someplace. [Such an accurate model of the ship is kind of weird already anyway! ...Although. Even while the laugh remain a short one, a slight and moderately satisfied smile can't help but linger afterwards, with Natsuno's assessment of the ship being made. Definitely not something he would normally say sober, Jade imagines, which means these must be his honest thoughts indeed. (What a vindicating thing, getting an emo teen to actually agree on the impressiveness of something like this...!)] It is quite 'cool', though, isn't it? Rest assured it's an exceedingly impressive sight at full size...but so long as we're here, I suppose this model is as good a display as any of--
[Oh, there it goes zipping across the floor, accompanied even by a soft thrum of miniaturized engines despite the fact that it probably is battery-powered in some way. But--wait a minute--
The little cannons fire off with crackling little pops, and the pinprick volley assails Jade's ankles.]
--Ah, I hadn't realized those actually shoot. That's--hold on, now-- [Natsuno...please....the shots are barely felt, of course, but Jade's still shifting his ankles aside where he's seated a bit exasperatedly when Natsuno fires them off again.] --No need to have too much fun, over there! Hmm, though I can now attest that those cannons are entirely harmless at that size, it seems...almost a bit of a shame.
[......Wait, hold on, did Natsuno acutally chuckle just now--?]
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Anyway, Natsuno is definitely enjoying himself and most definitely chuckling. In fact, he snorts again when Jade makes a fuss at being shot at. He makes the model face him and shoot to see what the big deal is, but it's just a tiny pinprick.]
Don't whine.
[There's another button he's yet to try. Natsuno presses it and activates the shield.]
Whoa... that's so well made. You should throw something at it to see if it holds.
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But anyway!! Anyway. There's more present cursed things to be worried about, namely: the fact that Natsuno really is outright having himself a laugh over there, as the Tartarus model zips and turns about, its tiny little fonic cannon rounds tested a couple more times as if this is the most pleasantly novel thing the boy's encountered in months. ...Well, alright, so it's not actually a terribly cursed sight. Strange, though, with how rare it is to see on Natsuno's features or hear in his voice. Jade may or may not be using the handful of seconds he takes meticulously readjusting his posture in his seat, still pointedly out of ankle-shooting range, to cast Natsuno a truly speculative sort of look across the way while the latter's distracted...
Hmm, he's truly almost acting his evident age here, in all the ways that rather more carefree teenaged boys might.
...It's unfortunate, that it'd take some bizarrely powerful form of alcohol to invoke this in him nowadays.]
--I am not whining. [The objection is slightly delayed, and a bit distracted, but fortunately Natsuno's activating the tiny shield around this point, which is unsurprisingly pretty engaging in its own right. Even Jade hums in a bit of surprise about here, though; wasn't expecting it to have that feature either, honestly??] But that is surprisingly thorough, to be included as well. ...That shielding's meant to hold against exceptionally large fonic shell impacts at the least. [Honestly, he probably shouldn't be indulging things too much here. Natsuno's still drunk, and they still need to get to the bottom of how this is actually happening, but. On the other hand. ...It is still a pretty effective distraction from him immediately heading over to Rita's with a flamethrower about now. And...he's just so happily fascinated by all this. Ah well.] Let's see...
[Reaches across the desk and then kind of, idly lobs one of Natsuno's smaller horror novels at it?
The shield snaps and sizzles on impact with it--but does hold, surprisingly, which means that the book ends up bouncing off it slightly.]
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[Natsuno's been staring expectantly, and the shield didn't disappoint. The book actually bounced off!]
That would've been useful against the zombies.
[He definitely has no concept of just how big the original Tartarus is, not in his state. Natsuno's thought already drift to the last feature he's yet to test, and he stumbles toward the bathroom, steering the model along - even letting out a distracted vrooooom sounds when it zips through the bathroom door.
It's supposed to move in water, right? Natsuno turns the tap on, considers and calls back to Jade:]
D'you have a water arte? It's gonna take forever until the bath gets filled.